Sure, I Can Do That!

When Carroll asked me if I would consider being tested with her to see if either of us could donate a kidney to her friend Ryan, the answer was, "Sure, I can do that!" Never did I think I would actually be compatible. Never did we think we were both compatible  This is the beginning of our story.

I learned of Carroll's friend, Ryan, when he was posting pictures from Paris. He was with his new wife and was having health issues in a foreign land. Carroll knew he needed a  kidney  she always told me Ryan is the nicest guy you will ever meet. He is a kind and loving soul  I have learned this as well. What an amazing man!

So it was March of 2019 when she asked about donating a kidney. She kept seeing more and more about his declining health. A couple of weeks later she reached out to Ryan to ask how we could be tested. He responded quickly and with enthusiasm. A couple weeks later Carroll called Tulane. A few weeks later the first test kits came in the mail. The journey began.

We drove to our nearest approved lab to give viles of blood and urine. A couple of weeks went by. We both got calls saying we both were compatible. What? What does this mean? Well, we were going to get a second test kit in the mail.

This new kit we had to coordinate with Ryan. They were doing more tests and mixing our blood with his to make sure it wouldn't be rejected. Guess what? It wasn't rejected and we were both still a match! 

Now the thoughts were, "This is real!" We had to seriously pray. It's easy to say we will get tested. It's another thing to find out, we really can donate a kidney. What will it be like to give a kidney? Will it hurt? Of course it will, its surgery. Will we be sick or die if we have only one? Studies show most people live just as long and just as healthy as people with both kidneys. All signs point to the fact that the body is resilient and adjust to only having one.

We have 2, why not share?!

The transplant team had to meet to discuss the results. Carroll was who they picked. Her kidney was slightly better than mine. 

A few weeks went by and we had a trip to New Orleans for testing at Tulane. Carroll went through all sorts of scans, meetings, tests etc. It wasnt hard or painful. Just a long day at the hospital.

A couple weeks later she gets a call. Now it has been months since we started this process. Carroll has it set in her mind, she is doing this. Carroll is donating a kidney. Well it was the doctor on the phone. We were told the nurse would call. 

It turns out her kidney is too good. She has 3 arteries instead of one going to the kidney. This complicates surgery and lessens the longevity of the kidney after transplant.  So they wanted to look at other options.

I have to say I was worried about her giving away her kidney. I really didnt want anything to happen or harm come to her. I love her so much! But she was determined to do this for Ryan. Now, she is crushed. She had her mind set. She doesnt like needles or pain, yet she knew she was going to give away a body part for a good friend. 

So here we are. Doctor Paramesh said they were looking at other options. I am the other option. So a month after carroll got tested, we are back at Tulane and I am now doing all that Carroll did.

The roles are reversed. She is worried about me, but by my side all the way.

Even though we both have gone through so many emotions, I have felt a peace all along. I know God has this. God has been with us each step of the way. 

I have a peace that only comes from our creator. I know I am carrying this kidney and going on this journey to not only help Ryan, but to help others.

I hope to bring an awareness to the need for living donors. Sharing my storyand my kidney, I hope to inspire and move others to sharing life with people they know or even strangers. There are over 100,000 people in need of a kidney in America. There are only about 6000 transplants a year. There are 350,000,000 Americans. Surely, we can increase the number of people offering and giving life to others in need!

My story is ongoing. The surgery is scheduled in March. Carroll and I, along with Ryan and Patience, covet your prayers. We appreciate your love and support on this journey.

We encourage you to prayerfully consider how you might bless others and change the world by supporting and being a part of the miracle of sharing life through organ donation.

You have 2, why not share? 

Give away body parts!

Healing the broken hearts...

3 

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. (John 27:14 NIV)

No words or thoughts can heal the broken hearts.

Everyday we are reminded of the evil that exists in our world.
We see it in our own community, in our town, our state, our
nation, and in the world in which we live. We turn on the
television, read our social media feeds, maybe even read the
newspaper (they still print newspapers) and see the hatred
and violence of hurting people. Our feeds and media reports
many time pour fuel on the fires of anger.

In the name of opposing opinions we spew hatred at others
whose hearts we may not know and understand. Well
intentioned people who abhor the violence and the aftermath
throw daggers at others who also abhor the violence and
aftermath all with the intention of stopping pain, suffering,
and senseless actions of inhumanity. The sick individuals who
carry out these inhumane and evil acts get the attention and
results they desire, more hatred and more violence.

Conversations need to be had, civilly. Dialogue needs to
continue. Action needs to be taken.

I have friends and people I care about deeply who find
themselves on both sides of the political and social arguments
of our society. The answers are always found in the middle with
those who are willing to work together for the greater good.

Those who have a faith in a God who created humanity and
said it was “very good” must come together to be the peace-
makers and voices of reason. Our churches must not continue
to alienate the “other” but embrace and love them. When we see
people hurting, we must go beyond praying to offer assistance.
If we don’t have the resources or abilities we know someone who
does.

Through the tears in our eyes and struggles of our hearts, let us
show the love of God to at least one person today. You know
someone who needs to know the love of God this day. By the
power and presence of the Holy Spirit, be the hands and feet and
heart of Jesus.

In Christ,

Pastor Mike

“Blessed are the poor in spirit,

   for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Blessed are those who mourn,

   for they will be comforted.

Blessed are the meek,

   for they will inherit the earth.

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,

   for they will be filled.

Blessed are the merciful,

   for they will be shown mercy.

Blessed are the pure in heart,

   for they will see God.

Blessed are the peacemakers,

   for they will be called children of God.

Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,

   for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”

(Matthew 5:3-10 NIV)

The "Gift"?

I consider myself to be a fun loving guy. I like to joke and play. I love playing with my kids and watching them goof off and have fun. Yet so often I find myself thinking like a grown up and not seeing the beauty in who they are and what they do.

My youngest absolutely loves Christmas time. He is such a neat, loving, and giving kid. This guy is always giving a large portion of his allowance, birthday, and Christmas money to the church. (He really does not get very much…) It amazes me how often I see his name on the list of givers for a Sunday.

So this Christmas he was in my room wrapping “gifts”. I have to say I kind of looked at him and asked what he was doing. “I am wrapping these for my teacher.”

“Oh, Why?”

“For my teacher for Christmas.”

I kind of rolled my eyes and said o.k. and walked away. He was wrapping used packing tape rolls and toilet paper rolls. My beautiful wife asked him if he was sure that his teacher would like the gift.

“She will LOVE it!” he assured her.

So he wrapped toilet paper rolls and used packing tape rolls to his heart’s content. I didn't say anything further his smile said it all.

This is one of those times that I didn't think much of it then, but looking back realized that I let my clouded, jaded, overly full adult mind lose sight of the joy and innocence of childhood. This kid was giving what he had. He was making gifts that meant something to him.

So, it is February now, Mike, why are you talking about Christmas? We had a meeting with his teacher yesterday. During the meeting she looked at us and said, “This is off topic, but did you know what your son did for me for Christmas.”

Not sure what she was talking about, we braced ourselves and said, “No?”

She proceeded to tell us about the gift she got. She talked about how excited this great guy was and how much he wanted her to open the gift he gave her. He continually asked her until she finally opened it during a break. To hear her enthusiasm for my child was awesome to me.

When she saw him next and he asked about the gift, she told him how excited she was. He told her that he knew she liked to be creative and could make something great. The excitement they shared was genuine, kind, loving, and amazing to me. This is why some people are 4^th grade teachers and others that are stuck in the mud with no imagination, like me, are not 4^th grade teachers.

 She went home and told her husband that she had to go to the craft store. She had to think of a way to make something great out of what my sweet kid gave her. She was excited to show us. She recognized that if an 8^th grader gave the gift, it would be odd. Even if certain other kids gave the gift, it would be odd. But my son gave the gift and his mind is creative, resourceful, super quick and often thinking of others.

When she walked in with her blinged out packing tape roll bangle bracelet, it put a smile on my face, joy in my heart, and a reminder in my life that the Gift is in the relationship not in the item or the expense.

 I love that my 9 year old can teach me so much!! I hope I can learn to love and show it as easily and effectively as he does! 

Helping Hands...

The more that I read about Jesus, the more that I study the Christian Faith, the more that I pursue a connection with the One that created all things, the more I pray, "let me be your hands, your feet, and your heart!"

At A Church Under Construction, now officially The Vine United Methodist Church, we have wanted to be more outwardly focused.  My goal has been to have everyone share my excitement, passion, and energy for serving others.  We have had great participation the last 2 Sundays and many more people who think it is really cool that we are doing it.

I understand faith, not as a faith of complacency, but of action.  No, I am not trying to earn a place in heaven, Jesus already offered that to me for free.  That's what we call GRACE.  But when I realized what grace is and realized how easy it is to follow Jesus (at least it is easy to understand free) I couldn't contain the energy boiling inside me to share that freedom with others.

My goal is not to reach all people, I know that is what God does through us.  My goal is to reach and connect with the people God puts in front of me.  Last week the group I was with handed out 70+ lunches to complete strangers.  they were all different ages, races, and nationalities.  I know we ran into language barriers a couple of times.  But God showed up anyway!  We had fun seeing the faces and meeting the people and being in their community.  Even though we were strangers we were welcomed in.

From here we invest our time, we return with more food, with other ways to break down language barriers.  We spend time with them where they are.  We don't ask them for anything. We don't even invite them to church.  We just let them know that they are loved.

Jesus did a lot of loving on people, healing people, and offering hope to them.  Through my "Helping Hands" and your helping hands we can do amazing things.  I haven't found a place in scripture where Jesus asked people to pray the prayer of salvation.  I do remember Jesus saying, "Go, your faith has made you well."  or "Go and sin no more."

It is through the conversation and the interactions and the stepping away from the expectations and into freedom and grace that people were and are healed.  We allow ourselves to find opportunities to be in relationship, God does the hard work of opening hearts and convicting people of the Joy that was sent in the form of a baby.

I invite you to step outside of the expectations that humans have put on you and me.  Step outside of what we have turned into an institution that perpetuates rules and guidelines.  Instead, just live in the community you are in. Live with people who are messy and broken.  (yes, live with yourself sometimes.)  Admit that we all have issues.  Admit that we wish we could do better, live better, treat others better, understand different people more, and try harder to forgive others and not point out their blemishes and faults.  Then realize, you are loved and forgiven anyway!

Jesus really did come, live, minister, die, and rise for you and me and everyone else in between.  Then share that great joy with everyone you can.  You will find that it is FUN to make others smile.  It is fun to use your hands, your feet, your time and your money to help others.  You will find your own faith grow and see others ask a lot of great questions.  Their smiles can move mountains of stress and worry.  The greatest thing is that God is planting roots and the vine of Christ continues to grow!

A Broken Heart

The idea of churches splitting, over hot issues like homosexuality and it's place in the church, has been around as long as I can remember.  Other denominations and congregations have split over smaller, less controversial issues. (paint colors, carpet, which version of bible did Jesus use? etc.) I just can't get out of my head how I believe Jesus would react to such things.

How often did Jesus tell the religious leaders they were following too strictly to law, going beyond God's intention, and forgetting the humanity of the individual they were condemning?  I think of the adulterous woman.(John 8) Now we don't even hear about the man, because he was a man and that was different.  But we know that the woman is about to be stoned for her sins.  The "good" religious leaders are bringing her up front to make a point.  We are horrified when we here stories like this in the modern day world.  We post all over FaceBook how horrible it is. We are horrified at "honor killings" we here about on the news. I think most of us believe that having intimate relationships with another person while in a monogamous relationship is wrong.  But we also believe that stoning someone to death for something they did consentually with another is a bit extreme. This is the premise I am starting with.

Jesus' reaction was to invite them to look at their own lives.  He challenged them in a non-threatening way to consider how perfect their lives were, where they may have unresolved issues that they have not addressed.  He offered the first one who has no sin to throw a stone.  Then he casually continued to write in the sand. They may or may not have changed their view on adultery, but they walked away anyway. The woman lived to face another day.

We can argue all day, all of our life as to what we consider sin to be and not be and never get any closer to agreeing.  But if we recognize Jesus taught compassion, love, mercy, and offered grace even to the vilest of offenders and offers grace to you and me, can Jesus not offer that same grace to people we think are sinners. Why do we get to choose that they are sinners?  Why do we have the right to find fault in them?  We can have our opinion, but are we allowed to discriminate, to alienate, or condemn anyone else in the name of God.

God speaks to me all the time, but I have never been given permission from my God to decide that someone else's sins or issues or problems were any of my concern unless it was to feed them or clothe them or care for them.

As I read one of the most well known scripture verses, "Jesus Wept." (John 11:35 NIV) I look at that story that surrounds it.  I think of how Jesus must be weeping now.  He wept in his humanity.  He wept as the Son of God while being fully human at the same time.  He wept at the sorrow and the emotions of the time when Lazarus died.  He wept with those others who were heart broken at the loss of a brother and friend.  Jesus empathized with Mary and Martha.  He felt their pain.  Then after it all, he raised Lazarus from the dead.

Our world is hurting, our churches are hurting, our people are hurting.  Why in God's name would we continue to find ways to harm each other?!  We will not agree on the issue of Homosexuality, ever.  But we can see in the life of Christ, he embraced people.  Jesus loved them.  Brought wholeness to their lives and lives of those around them.  He even embraced people others would never be seen with.  Why? Because it was the "right" thing to do.  Jesus sees the piece of God in each person of humanity.  (Genesis 1:27)

It is ludicrous to draw a line in the sand and say we need to split because I think differently than you. We might as well build our own little shrines in our rooms, because we will find ourselves alone if we expect total agreement on everything.  If we split now on this, then what's the next issue.  Is this just to get attention?  Do we feel better because we did what is "right"?  We showed the those sinners and sinner supporters that we are better than everyone else!  That is what makes my stomach turn and turns so many away from faith. We hurt the Kingdom of God more than we build it if all we are doing is building walls with no doors or windows.  

When the messiah teaches grace and we still teach law.  When the Messiah teaches forgiveness and we still condemn.  When the Messiah offers mercy and we offer hate.  Who are we helping?  Who are we hurting?  Is it really sharing a relationship with a God who so loved humanity that he would sacrifice so much? 

My understanding of God is that God has stayed the same forever. Humanity continues to try to figure God out.  We continue to define and decide who and what God really is.  So often we put our limitations, fears, prejudices into our understanding.  Then others suffer for it.

There are still a lot of things I don't understand. I don't understand all there is to know about humanity, homosexuality, and sin. There are things I can't figure out. But the thing I do know is God's love!

I really think the divisive challenges to the Church, the instrument of compassion and God's tool used to share life with people, breaks the heart of God.  I believe if we were to write it down again, it would be repeated.  "Jesus Wept!" 

The easy way out... Separation and Divorce rather than dialogue....

As I prepare for annual conference and recognize that there are conversations going on all over the country regarding the "need" to draw a line in the sand, I find myself in contemplation and prayer. We are all being asked to choose which side we find ourselves on based on one small facet of humanity that is barely dealt with in Bible.  Not to say human sexuality should be ignored as mentioned in the bible, but to allow one aspect of humanity to determine what "kind" of church, Christian, and Pastor you are is ridiculous.

My faith is much deeper and broader than a single issue.  I love that fact that we as United Methodist remain United despite our differences of thought and understanding.  We have been invited over the history of our denomination to use Scripture, tradition, experience, and reason to guide and shape our faith.  We have always had people on both sides that say you have to follow their understanding to be a "real" Christian.  If you disagree on a certain topic, you obviously do not "really" know Christ.  How ludicrous is this! to say all of our experiences and traditions will lead us to one thought on all topics is merely impossible and not the heart and basis of the God I understand through the truth of Scripture. The stories are varied to reach a variety of humanity.

God has spoken to me in very real ways.  I have been affirmed by the hand and presence of God in all aspects of my life, family, and ministry.  Yet, I know many great and faithful Christians that disagree with my understanding of God, Scripture, Grace, and so much more.  I have people who would consider themselves liberal and others conservative and there are issues we all disagree on that we can each justify with the Bible.  Bible and understanding of Bible have changed over time and history as humanity discovers more of who God is and as research into history as exposed meanings and writings that were not previously known.

We have arguments over which translation "really" understands and conveys the true nature of the original texts.  We have had different councils to canonize and recononize scripture as the Church has seen schism over history.  Yet God is still present and living and working in the lives of people all over the world.

The very thing Jesus came to dispute, legalism over relationship, is the very thing people are saying we have to split because of.  I love the fact that even though we disagree we are still connected by the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus.

In our society, we seem to be teaching our children that if times get tough, if you have a disagreement with someone, if you don't like the way someone does something, split up, go the other way, divorce.  We might as well say, "there is no need to try to work through our differences or try to come to a mutual understanding or even realizing that the beauty of humanity is in the fact that we are not always going to agree because our life, gifts, and understandings are different."

Groups of Christians will condemn divorce and those who are divorced by utilizing scripture. The very same faction who holds this as true based on a handful of texts in scripture are wanting our churches to divorce one another.  It is easier to divorce and draw a line in the sand rather than seeking unity in the body.  Scripture also reminds us the body of Christ in which one portion is missing hinders the ministry of the whole.

The United Methodist Church has always stood on our differences and the fact that we can differ and ask the hard questions and sill be "United".  We live our faith in the grey areas.  It recognizes that we are human, not divine. We embrace the questions and the way questioning helps us grow in faith and affirms our understanding of God.  I don't know anyone who has all the answers they need.  I think the bible leaves questions intentionally unanswered so that we can seek the answers.  Whether you believe the Bible is a group of stories and antidotes or every word in the Bible is perfect and given by God, there are still unanswered questions on the nature of God and the reason for things to be done the way they are.

My church is a church for people who are imperfect and flawed and yet trying to seek God from that position.  Jesus never invited people to come to him, fix everything in their life, and then he would heal them.  No!  He met them where they were.  Sometimes he met them even when they were not seeking him.  He healed them, forgave them, and invited them to follow him.  Never asking to be perfect but with the encouragement, "Go and sin no more."  Jesus knew this is not possible, but we strive to relate, to follow, to trust that through the relationship we build with the One who gave all, will sustain us, bless us, and make us whole.

There is no easy way out.  A line in the sand brings more hate and discord than a conversation and agreement that God is bigger than our need to be "right".  My God can handle relationships with all of humanity, billions and billions of people over all time. None of those agreed on everything, even what some consider to be the "big things!"

I pray for those whose hearts are hardened.  I pray the God of grace, mercy, and justice will continue to use each of us to share hope, promise, and truth with the people that are put in front of us not for our sake but for the sake of God's kingdom on earth as it is in heaven!

In Jesus Name! Amen!

In Christ,
Pastor Mike

Where is God?

Over the last several weeks I have had a range of emotions around the work we are doing at Kilgo and St. Luke UMC. We have been working to let our heart for people guide our ministry and yet still try to love the people who built the church.

It should be one in the same, but surprisingly it isn't.  When I went into ministry all I wanted to do is share my enthusiasm for God through my understanding of Jesus with everyone I could.  Yet, what I figured out over time is that "church" is about structure and habits and rules.  It literally has broken my heart over and over and over again!

So I always had my ministry "in the world" on my own on my time.  Carroll and I will spend time at the same restaurant each week getting to know the people who work there.  Not to minister to them, just to eat. As it turns out though, we build amazing relationships in which often we do minister to and with these great people we meet.

We always have wanted to be a part of a ministry that just mimicked Jesus in the way the community lived and related to others.  We wanted to break down barriers of stereotypes looking outside of the church and looking inside.  We want to be in community with people who recognize that we are all imperfect "works in progress" living the best we can everyday.  And yet, at the same time, just loving people.  Being there when they need help or to cry or to laugh.  Letting them be there when we need the same.

No pretense or preconceived agendas can come between us. We just live as authentically as we can. Even with this, there will be people who find fault with us or those we want to be in community with.  So be it.  We can't change them, only us.

Lately, that is where God has been taking me.  Recognizing that no matter how much I want to help someone change their life, I can't.  I can't change them, fix them, or their situation.  Only person I can change, and it is really hard, is me.  God shows up when I recognize that in order to change anything in the world, I have to be flexible, open, and honest as myself and with myself.

That is what we strive for at the Vine.  That is what I strive for everyday.  I hope you find God where you are.

In Christ,
Mike

What is the Vine?

The Vine is a community of people who are not perfect, but seek to find God where we are. We seek to show God's love and compassion to all around us regardless of human boundaries. We seek to worship God from our hearts without pretense and agenda. We welcome all who are seeking answers to join us in our lifelong journey to build selfless, loving relationships with Our Creator and our community in the way Jesus did.